The Single Girl's to do List Chapter 17


‘I can’t believe you’re actually going on a date with your school crush.’

Emelie was merrily munching on pastries in bed, despite my repeated

warnings not to get crumbs under the covers. I was busy trying on every

outfit I’d brought with me. Nothing felt right. Redhead Rachel had, for

some reason, failed to show up this morning and I was as nervous as an X

Factor auditionee who was only there because my dead dad had made me

promise to try.

‘It’s going to be so awesome. You’re totally going to marry him.’

‘Nothing like putting pressure on a situation,’ I muttered into the mirror

on the back of the door. ‘This? Is this OK?’

I’d opted for the strappy, pale yellow sundress decorated with a tiny

white swallow print that fell just above my knee, together with white ballet

flats and, because I was having to play this one without my overconfident

alter-ego, a cardi. Just in case.

Em nodded, swallowing a mouthful of croissant.

‘It’s fine.’ She moved on to pulling apart a mini-muffin. ‘You’re going to

marry your childhood sweetheart and I’ll probably end up marrying your

slutty brother. It’ll be like a movie.’

‘Don’t even joke about it.’ I fussed with my hair, pulling bits back,

letting them drop around my face and then pulling them back again. Why

did nothing look right? Why was this so hard? ‘You know I wouldn’t wish

that on my worst enemy.’

‘I don’t know,’ Em replied. ‘I reckon he and Ana would make a good

couple. If I don’t get in there first.’

‘Emelie,’ I whined. This conversation was not helping me be my most

calm and wonderful self. ‘Out with it. Do you really like Paul or is this just

some desperate cry for help?’

She pulled her most attractive truffle-pig face and concentrated hard on a

muffin. ‘I don’t know.’ She popped a piece of muffin in her mouth. ‘I know

you think it’s disgusting, but don’t you think it’s time I gave the whole

boyfriend thing a go?’

‘Yes, but not with my brother.’ I swiped a tiny little Danish from the

breakfast tray before she cleared it. ‘And not because it’s gross but because

he’s not good enough for you.’

‘He could be sitting outside my bedroom window serenading me every

night and you wouldn’t think he was good enough for me,’ she pointed out.

‘You’ll never see past him being your brother.’

I thought back to what Jenny had said about ‘The One’ in the bar the

night before. Was that how she felt about Paul? Had I been standing in the

way of them being together for years? If it didn’t still turn my stomach, I’d

feel just awful. But it did so I didn’t.

‘Jesus Christ, I love this city.’ The door swung open towards me as

Matthew crashed through it, still in the clothes he’d worn to travel in on

Sunday morning. And with the five-hour time difference, that was well over

twenty-four hours ago. Although, by the looks of the outfit and Matthew’s

face, they’d both clearly spent some time on the floor overnight. ‘I met

someone.’

‘You don’t say.’ I held my arms out and spun for approval.

‘You look lovely,’ he said, shedding his clothes and walking towards the

shower. ‘I’m sure you look lovely.’

‘Um, what’s with the nudity?’ Em shouted across the room as his boxers

hit the floor. ‘I’m eating. And I thought you were the world’s biggest

prude?’

‘Just because I don’t want to see you naked doesn’t mean you should be

denied the privilege of this,’ Matthew bowed with a flourish before ducking

into the shower cubicle. ‘Where are you going?’

‘Brunch with Ethan,’ I took one more deep breath, blew it out and picked

up my bag. ‘Is it warm out?’

‘Don’t know, I never left the hotel,’ he shouted over the running water.

‘Met a delightful artist downstairs. His name’s Dallas; he stays here when

he’s in the city. Lives in some godawful place where they have to kill things

to eat them.’

‘You have to kill them?’ Em sounded sceptical.

‘I’m not saying there isn’t a Tesco’s around there somewhere but you get

the idea,’ he said, soaping up. ‘It was a brilliant pick-up line anyway.’

‘I’d better go,’ I said, looking at my watch and trying to ignore the gutchurning

nausea in my stomach. Really, butterflies would have sufficed.

‘Really, do I look all right?’

‘You look very cute,’ Emelie confirmed. ‘If I hadn’t seen you since I was

sixteen, I’d be very impressed.’

‘I was a total loser at sixteen.’ I fussed with my hair one last time before

throwing my bag over my shoulder and checking for the hotel room key.

‘Braces, Sun-In, three-inch turn-ups on all my trousers. Not good.’

‘Then you’re already on a winner.’ She settled back on the bed and

turned on the TV. ‘He’s expecting sixteen and gross. He’s getting twentyeight

and amazing.’

‘True,’ I muttered. ‘Wish me luck.’

‘Good luck,’ she said with a wave. ‘Text me, let me know what you’re

doing.’

Matthew drew a smiley face in the steam on the shower door and waved.

And then drew a giant penis and gave me a thumbs-up. I took that as my

cue to leave.

Even in the crowded café, I spotted Ethan immediately. Amongst all the

flannel-shirt-wearing, beanie-hat-sporting hipsters, his big blue eyes, bright

blond hair stuck out like a very attractive sore thumb. He looked exactly the

same. Until he stood up. While I’d spent the last ten years playing house

and powdering supermodel’s arses, it looked as if Ethan had spent a decade

bench-pressing bears. He was big. Really big. He met my eyes, did a second

take on the hair, which I suddenly remembered was bright red instead of

dark blonde, and then gave me a wave. And suddenly I was Body Shop

White Musk, Robbie Williams and a packet of Chipsticks all over again.

‘Rachel?’ As soon as I was within grabbing distance, he wrapped his

arms around me in a massive hug. So absence really did make the heart

grow fonder. I couldn’t even pass him sheet music without blanching

before. ‘It’s so good to see you.’

‘You too.’ I was almost too afraid to sit down. He was so pretty. The

Facebook photos really hadn’t done him any justice; he was just a very

handsome man. Really, he looked so incredibly clean-cut, I kept expecting

him to pull a piece of wood out from under the table and start sandpapering,

or for a giant golden Labrador to bound up and lick his face. If I didn’t do it

first. Not my usual type, but beggars can’t be choosers. Especially when the

choice was Adonis or nothing.

‘You look great,’ Ethan reached out for the glass of water in front of him.

‘I don’t think I would have recognized you on the street. You were always

such a tomboy. And the hair! Wow.’

I was sitting in a café in Toronto with Ethan Harrison. The Ethan

Harrison. As in ‘Rachel Loves Ethan 4 eva IDST’, Ethan Harrison. Sigh,

swoon, thud.

‘You look just the same.’ Aside from the muscles and the lack of braces

and the muscles and the extra foot in height. And the muscles. I couldn’t

quite look him in the eye so I stuck to the collar of his white polo shirt and

promised myself I’d try to work my way up. ‘You sound a bit different

though.’

‘Yeah, I suppose I’ve picked up the accent,’ he laughed. ‘My dad is

Canadian so I’d always had a twang at home. Once we got out here, it just

came out of nowhere.’

‘One of my best friends is from Montreal, I’m totally used to it.’ I

ordered a coffee and built up to his chin. Good, solid, square jaw. His strawblond

hair was just starting to curl around his ears and, while it was a lot

shorter in the front than it used to be, my heart fluttered at the thought of

there being just enough for me to reach over and brush it out of his eyes. If I

weren’t sitting on my hands. In a café in Canada. Opposite Ethan Harrison.

Where was Redhead Rachel? Sixteen-year-old Rachel was not qualified to

handle this.

‘Isn’t it strange?’ Ethan scratched his head and his bicep strained against

the cuff of his T-shirt. His arms were even bigger than Dan’s. Not that I was

thinking about Dan. ‘If you’d told me ten years ago that you and I would be

sitting here now, I would never have believed you.’

‘That has been a recurring theme lately,’ I agreed, pushing all thoughts of

London out of my mind. ‘Although, to be fair, if you’d told me a week ago

I’d be sitting here, I wouldn’t have believed you.’

‘It was a last-minute job?’ he asked. ‘In Vancouver?’

I stared at him for just a second too long. ‘Yes. Vancouver. Last minute.

Job,’ I nodded. ‘It’s a shoot. For a magazine.’

‘And you’re a make-up artist?’ He sounded surprised but he was still

smiling. ‘That’s so strange. I just don’t remember you being one of those

girls.’

‘One of what girls?’ I was always curious to hear what other people

thought of me. Apart from Dan. I didn’t need to hear what Dan thought ever

again. Because I wasn’t thinking about Dan. Eurgh.

‘Oh, I don’t mean anything bad.’ His cheeks burned with an adorable

embarrassed blush. Ahh. ‘It’s like, there was a whole group of girls who

wore so much make-up at school. The Lip Gloss Girls. That was what I

called them.’

‘The Lip Gloss Girls?’ I laughed, knowing exactly who he was talking

about. I had been insanely jealous of each and every one of them. ‘That’s

awful.’

‘You know, Louise and Claire and all those others – they were, like,

constantly putting on that gross lip gloss.’ He pulled a face as a very pretty

waiter in a black knitted cap brought over coffee. Professional experience

said male model. Ordering-from-male-models-posing-as-waiters experience

said he would absolutely get our order wrong. ‘I remember thinking it

looked like they had glue all over their mouths. Who would want to make

out with that?’

‘Yeah, I wasn’t really into all that stuff then,’ I pressed my own lipglossed

lips together and willed the sticky shine to Go Away. ‘I love it

though. I meet a lot of interesting people.’

‘Really?’

‘No,’ I replied immediately. ‘Nearly all people are horrible. Just awful.’

‘You always were funny,’ Ethan placed a hand over mine. I tried not to

have a stroke. ‘It’s really good to see you. I got to say, I’m loving the

internet right now. This totally makes up for all those godawful online dates

I’ve been on.’

‘Big fan of Match.com?’ I tried to sound casual, but really I was

desperate to know. There must be something horribly, horribly wrong with

him that I couldn’t see. Nazi sympathizer? Video-game geek? Puppy

kicker? There had to be something wrong with either him or all the women

in Canada. I was this close to proposing with an onion ring.

‘Not hardly.’ He let go of my hand. My heart shattered into a million tiny

pieces. And there was a chance I was suffering from an epic case of internal

monologue hyper-bole. ‘I haven’t been single that long. Me and my ex

broke up earlier this year and I sorta spent all summer sulking. Now it’s

almost time for school again. I’m just way too busy to really date properly.

It’s hard work out here.’

But you wouldn’t be too busy for a long-distance relationship with your

childhood sweetheart, I thought. Wonder what he’s doing next Saturday?

Possibly getting a little bit ahead of myself.

‘What about you?’ He gave me a look. ‘Lots of online action?’

‘Ha,’ I snorted. Very sexy. ‘Not quite. I haven’t been single that long

either, though.’

When I actually added it all up, after drinks with my new BFF in the bar

the night before, it had been less than two months in twelve years. I’d

started going out with my first boyfriend in the October of Year Twelve,

and Simon and I had been broken up for eight days. There was no wonder I

needed help.

‘This place is pretty great.’ He waved a hand around at the café after

we’d ordered breakfast. I’d gone for the breakfast sandwich, exactly as it

was advertised on the menu. Ethan had attempted to request a couple of

substitutions to something resembling a fry-up and been greeted with

repeated confusion from the hot server. As a waiter, he made a great model.

I expected to be doing the make-up on his Armani underwear campaign any

day. ‘Some friends of mine hang out in the bar sometimes but I’ve never

been.’

‘Yeah, I heard it was a nice spot,’ I agreed. I’d already decided to keep to

myself the fact that I was only staying at The Drake because my gay best

friend’s gay best friend got a shag every time he visited. Why blow the

mystique?

‘So what are your plans while in Toronto?’ Ethan reached across the table

to give my hand another squeeze. I was definitely going to have a stroke.

‘You’re here today and tomorrow, right?’

‘Yep. Two days and then on to Vancouver.’ I was actually a very passable

liar when I had my story straight. I imagined this would come to work in

my favour should I ever need to explain Simon’s mysterious disappearance.

‘I don’t really have any plans while I’m here, though. I ended up meeting

the stylist when I got in last night.’

That wasn’t so much a lie as a grammatical error. Technically. Jenny was

a stylist.

‘So, you want me to show you around?’ He gave me another flash of that

big white grin and I felt myself flush from head to toe. ‘I’m not much of a

tour guide, but I’m sure I can do the sights.’

I was very satisfied with the sight in front of me as it was, but it was

always nice to show willing.

‘Sounds brilliant,’ I confirmed. ‘I’d love to.’

It didn’t take me long to fall in love with Toronto. Between my charming

tour guide and the almost offensively friendly people, not to mention the

abundance of maple syrup shoved sideways into every foodstuff available,

it was nearly impossible not to. By mid-afternoon, I was ninety-five per

cent sugar. And I was perfectly happy with that.

After breakfast, we came out of the hotel and hit the street. Ethan

pointing out little art galleries, vintage boutiques and every single dog that

went by. Everything about the morning was horribly cute. Even though the

neighbourhood had adopted a New York sort of attitude, all artfully

distressed fabrics, buildings covered in political graffiti and every shop

manned exclusively by skinny boys in plaid shirts and fertility impairing

tight jeans, they all maintained their native hospitality. I couldn’t remember

the last time I’d said hello to so many strangers. And as a dyed-in-the-wool

Londoner, I wasn’t sure how I felt about that, until I’d had my second

maple syrup macchiato, at which point I more or less felt brilliant about

everything.

By the time we’d crossed everything off Ethan’s sightseeing list (sadly it

wasn’t a physical list) we’d visited the CN Tower, the Hockey Hall of

Fame, walked down the boardwalk, considered going inside the Royal

Ontario Museum but settled for just judging the bizarre architecture (it

looked as though a spaceship had crashed into the V&A), and eventually set

up shop in the rooftop bar of the Thompson hotel, where I could see all of

Toronto laid out in front of me. (Despite my terrible lemming tendencies, I

had to admit the view was beautiful. And as long as I stayed away from the

edge, I was OK. Ish.) I’d drawn a line at checking out the Bryan Adams star

on the Canadian walk of fame, but I did appreciate his enthusiasm for his

heritage. I was also knackered and very much wanted a little sit-down. Em

and Matthew had both texted to say they’d spent the entire day sitting on

their arses on the roof deck of our own hotel, slowly getting drunk and

eating everything on the menu. Despite the fact that I’d had a lovely, lovely

day, I couldn’t help but be a little bit jealous.

Ethan had been a wonderful host. He opened doors, he pulled out my

chair and he wouldn’t let me pay for a thing. Every word out of his mouth

was funny or sweet and always interesting. He was aware, he was

intelligent; I found out he loved his career as a teacher, spent as much time

reading and researching lesson plans as he did going hiking with Sadie, his

golden retriever, and every thought that passed through his mind was

spelled out on his honest face. There was no pretence, no guessing games. I

asked a question, he answered it. He asked a question, he wanted to know

the answer. Ethan Harrison was, to all intents and purposes, the perfect

man.

So all I could hope was that it was the jetlag that was leaving me feeling

completely and utterly unaffected by his attention. We were sitting side by

side on the corner of a high table, not too close to the edge of the deck. I

stole a glance at my date, the sun setting in the sky behind him, lighting up

his hair and casting shadows on his handsome face. Why didn’t I feel

anything? Once I’d got over the initial buzz and potential heart attack,

something strange had happened. Nothing. I liked Ethan but I didn’t like

him. Try as I might, there was just nothing there.

‘You really set the fire alarm off at The Savoy?’ he asked over a giant

plate of what looked like chips and gravy covered in baby food. It was not

the most appetizing thing anyone had ever put down in front of me, but I

was assured poutine was a delicacy. I couldn’t see how the chef could work

maple syrup into it and, therefore, I was officially not interested.

‘I did,’ I confirmed. ‘Unless the Metropolitan Police happen to ask. In

which case it was an accident and nothing to do with me.’

Given how I’d come to be in touch with him again, I’d left the single

girl’s to-do list out of our conversation so far but, now we’d settled in one

place, we were running out of conversation. Fast. I wasn’t into ice hockey;

he didn’t follow football any more. He loved to hike. Surviving in the great

outdoors without a corkscrew was one of my greatest fears. Ethan didn’t

watch TV. Didn’t. Watch. TV. What option did I have left?

‘You’re insane.’ Ethan smiled across at me with crinkly blue eyes. ‘I

knew you were cool but now I see you’re completely crazy.’

‘Not really.’ I rubbed the tattoo on my right wrist. It was almost

completely smooth again. ‘Mostly incredibly ordinary. According to some

people, I’m actually very boring.’

‘I don’t believe it,’ he said. ‘Who would ever think you were boring?’

I rested my elbow on the table and covered a small smile with my hand.

I’d only had a couple of sips of my drink but my head was swimming

already. The perils of jetlag and cocktails. Jetlag and cocktails. Nice to mix

things up from the usual Monday routine.

You know what’s wrong here, whispered Redhead Rachel, appearing out

of nowhere. You know exactly what’s wrong with this situation.

Nice of her to show up at the end of the bloody day. This might be the

only instance where it was better never than late.

‘Really, I’m a big fan of the quiet life.’ I chose to ignore my bitchy alter

ego but, even as I said the words, I knew it wasn’t true any more. ‘I don’t

need to be out punching supermodels in the face every Wednesday.’

OK, that part was true, but I didn’t want to spend every Thursday night

making spaghetti bolognese for a man who didn’t deserve it either. I’d

rather just make it for myself. Possibly for Emelie. I’d never be cooking for

Matthew ever again. Ethan’s expression suggested he was still stuck on the

‘punch a supermodel in the face’ part of our conversation.

I picked up a chip that seemed relatively gravy-and cheese-curd-free.

‘That was Emelie anyway.’ I bit into the chip. I put the chip back down.

Bleurgh. ‘I just set off the fire alarm.’

‘I can’t believe how much you’ve changed.’ Ethan started on the poutine

with much more commitment. ‘You know you’re kind of amazing, right?’

You are amazing. Redhead Rachel yawned at my side. And he’s

completely and utterly dull.

Redhead Rachel was a bit mean. But worryingly correct.

‘Really, not amazing. We should have caught up a month ago.’ I raised an

eyebrow. ‘Things were very different.’

But of course we wouldn’t have been able to catch up a month ago

because, without the list, I would never have thought to look him up.

Matthew would never have messaged him. I would never have been sitting

in a bar in Toronto. I would have been watching Match of the Day with half

a Domino’s Tunion and the best part of a bottle of white wine giving me

indigestion.

‘So, Rachel Summers, high-flying international make-up artist,’ Ethan

held an imaginary microphone out to me. ‘Where do you see yourself in

five years?’

‘Another answer that would have been very different a month ago,’ I

replied, wondering what the answer was now. ‘Tough question, Mr

Harrison.’

‘How so?’

‘A month ago I would have freaked out at the thought of how old I’ll be

in five years. Thirty-three. Scary.’ I closed my eyes and swallowed. ‘And

I’d definitely have said I’d be married with a baby. Maybe two. That’s it

probably.’

Ethan smiled happily. ‘Sounds like my answer.’

‘I’m just not sure it would be mine any more.’ I rubbed my tattoo and

pushed my hair back behind my ears, letting it fall back around my face.

‘Thirty-three doesn’t seem nearly as scary as the idea of having kids right

now.’

‘So what do you want?’ he asked.

I laughed out loud and smiled at my answer. ‘I don’t know. I really don’t

know. Just getting a clearer idea of what I don’t want.’

‘Do you think you’ll stay in London?’ Ethan asked as I turned in my

chair to look out at the sun setting over the city. It had never occurred to me

that it would be so pretty here. In fact, like so many things, Canada had

never really occurred to me at all. I was glad Matthew had made me come; I

was a frog in a well. Or a slightly more flattering animal. The lights of the

CN Tower were just starting to stand out against the powdery sky and Lake

Ontario glittered in the distance. ‘I hear Toronto is running very short on

make-up artists.’

‘Really?’

Boring, the redhead whined, he’s cheesy and boring. Aren’t we over that?

‘Really.’

It would have been the perfect time for a kiss. Sitting there shoulder to

shoulder, knees touching under the table, sharing a drink at the end of a

wonderful day after all these years apart but, when it came down to it, my

butterflies had fluttered off somewhere else.

‘You probably wouldn’t realize how much you’d miss it unless you left,’

Ethan broke the tension and pulled away. ‘I think that’s the thing about

cities – you get used to all the things they offer you, then you really don’t

think about it until it’s taken away. I lived in New York for a summer after

college and, when I got back to Toronto, things here just seemed so slow,

like it took forever to get anything done. But now I wouldn’t leave for

anything. I just want to go to work, come home, walk my dog and chill out.’

‘Sounds nice,’ I said. Rachel from one week ago would have genuinely

considered that blissful. Redhead Rachel was gagging with her fingers

down the back of her throat. And, somewhere in the middle, the real Rachel

knew this wasn’t the life for her. As wonderful and romantic as it would

have been to run away with my teenage dream, it just wasn’t going to

happen.

He rubbed a hand over his face and rested his forehead against his fist. ‘I

can’t even start to wonder how boring my life must sound to you. I don’t

mean I just sit in my house every day waiting to go to sleep. I just mean this

is a great city if you don’t want to be constantly freaking out. It’s a great

place.’

‘It’s beautiful.’ I fingered the change in the pocket of my sundress, no

idea what to say next. ‘And you have animals on your money.’

Ethan smiled. I wondered when I’d become mentally unstable.

‘Yes we do.’ He leaned in towards me and loosened the hair behind my

ear.

‘Beavers,’ I held it up to show him. ‘And, is that a moose? Funny.’

‘I guess I never thought about it.’ His smile was just a little bit crooked

even though his post-braces teeth were perfect. Why wasn’t I falling for

this? I was clearly defective. ‘I guess I never thought about a lot of things.’

Out of the mouths of fools and babes, Redhead Rachel commented while

inspecting her nails to my left.

‘I’ve been thinking about something.’ Ethan leaned in for the kill.

His lips were only on mine for a moment. It wasn’t even really a kiss,

more of a test-the-waters peck and, as soon as I’d got used to them being

there, they were gone. It was soft and sweet and a perfect first kiss.

It just wasn’t Dan.

‘I totally just got off with Rachel Summers,’ Ethan blushed, placing his

hand over mine and gently squeezing it. ‘Wait until I tell the lads.’

‘Only took you twelve years,’ I said quietly, trying to smile. What was

wrong with me? Why was I thinking about Dan? I tried to imagine how I’d

be feeling if we were round the back of the sports hall, his Lynx Java

mingling with my Impulse Vanilla Kisses instead of on the rooftop of a

posh hotel, my Marc Jacobs Daisy and his nothing at all. The whiff of dog

food on chips didn’t help, but that really wasn’t the problem here.

I’d been trying so hard to make this Ethan thing real I was completely

ignoring a far more worrying situation. And it wasn’t the chips. ‘So what do

you want to do now?’ he asked. ‘We could catch a movie maybe? Dinner?

You’re not really feeling the poutine, right?’

‘I’m so sorry but I’m sort of knackered.’ I yawned to demonstrate my

point. ‘I really just want to go to bed.’

‘Bed?’ If he spent any more time blushing, he’d be no use to anyone in

the bedroom anyway. Every ounce of blood in his body was making a

beeline for his cheeks.

‘My bed,’ I clarified hastily. Wow, way to leave a sentence open for

entirely the wrong interpretation. ‘I should go to my bed and sleep. Jetlag.’

As soon as the words were out of my mouth, it was as if my body just

gave up. As the sky above us turned from powder blue to a soft, dusky

purple, my ability to keep my eyes open began to fail and all I wanted was

my bed. Maybe my judgement was just impaired by the shroud of sleepy. I

needed to rest. When I had a clear head I’d be able to work out what exactly

was wrong with this picture. Or at least what was wrong with me.

Redhead Rachel was already standing by the lift, tapping her watch. She

seemed to know exactly what was going on. If only she would let me in on

it.

‘Jeez, you must be totally jetlagged.’ Ethan looked a little bit

disappointed but, ever the gentleman, he signalled for the bill and gave my

hand another squeeze. ‘I had a lot of fun today. It was great to catch up.’

‘Definitely.’ It had been fun. It just hadn’t been the whirlwind romance

I’d built myself up for. ‘Thank you so much for showing me around.’

‘Let’s get you back to your hotel.’ He threw a couple of notes on the bar

and flashed the waitress a goodnight smile. The dimples I’d wanted to

tweak so desperately in Year Eleven returned with a vengeance. I really

wished I could pin down what was wrong with me. Surely it wasn’t just that

he didn’t watch TV?

‘Thanks.’ I hopped down off my bar stool and let him wind his fingers

around mine, hoping to feel something gooey and lovely in my stomach.

All I could feel was that one rancid chip rattling around. Truly it was the

stuff great love stories were made of.

‘So this is you.’ Ethan’s very practical car pulled to a stop outside the shiny

black fascia of The Drake.

I unbuckled my seatbelt and gave him my best sleepy smile. At least I

hoped it was a good sleepy smile and not just cross-eyed. ‘Thanks so much,

it was fun.’

‘It was.’ He turned off the engine and wrapped his hands around the

steering wheel. Ruh-roh, that was a very serious face. ‘I know you have to

leave on Wednesday but do you have plans tomorrow?’

‘I don’t know,’ I lied. ‘Can I text and let you know?’

‘Of course.’ He shifted in his seat until he was facing me. ‘I’d really like

to hang out. Today was awesome.’

‘Right.’ I turned quickly, one hand on the door handle, leaned in to plant

a kiss on his cheek and then bolted out of the door. ‘Night, Ethan.’

I slammed it shut behind me and was safely inside the hotel before I even

heard his engine turn over.

‘Hi, Miss Summers,’ the receptionist gave me a wave. ‘Good evening?’

‘Yes?’ I offered. She looked as convinced of that as I did. Em had texted

me to say she and Matthew were in the bar and to come and join them, but

since I clearly couldn’t be trusted to deal with people, I headed straight up

the stairs to bed. It would be nice to have a shower without an audience.

‘Well, sleep tight,’ she called after me.

‘Yeah, whatever,’ I chuntered, mounting the stairs.

Fat bloody chance of that. 

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